A Girl In The Well
Can we become whole without accepting the parts of ourselves we hide?
Meaning
I wrote this song around the Jungian psychology concept of shadow work. In Jung's theory, the shadow is made up of the parts of ourselves that we do not accept or identify with. These are not necessarily the “bad” or evil parts of us. They are often simply the qualities that do not fit the image we prefer to have of ourselves.
For example, a person might see themselves as someone who is always nice, calm, and easy-going, so they refuse to accept that they’re capable of becoming angry or yelling at someone. But anger isn’t something evil to be rejected. Without anger, you cannot standup for yourself when someone crossed your boundaries. Rejecting that anger does not make it disappear, but instead comes up in ways we least expected. Shadow work is about acknowledging these hidden parts and learning how to integrate them into who we are.
In the song, the narrator represents the ego—the familiar part of our personality that we identify with as “us.” The girl at the bottom of the well represents the shadow. At first, the narrator isn’t sure whether this girl is a helpless damsel, a disguised demon, a deadly siren, or a friend. This reflects the fear and uncertainty we often feel toward the parts of ourselves we have buried.
The knights, wizards, and scholars cannot find the girl because no hero, expert, or outside force can do this inner work for us. The narrator has to descend into the well herself. When she finally reaches the girl and sees her face reflected in the water, she realizes that they are the same person. The girl shows her that she cannot shine without casting a shadow, a saying that Jung often wrote in his work. Accepting the shadow does not mean becoming dark or allowing every impulse to control us; it means recognizing that both sides belong to one whole person.
The girl can also be understood as a neglected inner child, which may be a more familiar way for some listeners to connect with the song. She is the part of us who was hurt, ignored, or left behind and is still waiting for us to say: I see you. You are part of me. Come home.
Inspiration
The main reason I wanted to create this song was to express my own journey of shadow work and integration. In a way, this is what I do whenever I write and compose music. Shadow work is part of my creative process: I draw from my own experiences and the collective unconscious to create songs that can become a form of shadow work for others, inviting listeners to reflect on their own Self and their own journey.
Every time I write, I meet a part of myself that I may not have known existed or do not normally identify with in daily life. I embody that part, then bring them into the lyrics and instrumentation. Writing a song becomes a process of meeting, understanding, and integrating my own shadow first and foremost.
For this song, I wanted to turn the abstract idea of shadow work into a dark fairy tale. The image of a forgotten girl at the bottom of a well captured the feeling of a part of ourselves buried so deeply that even the bravest knights, most powerful wizards, and wisest scholars cannot see her. The only person who can reach her is the other half of herself, because the girl is not someone separate who needs to be rescued. She is the narrator's own hidden self.
The parenthetical lyrics are sung by the shadow as she guides the narrator deeper: “One breath at a time,” “Dive into the water,” and “I am not your horror.” I wanted the shadow's voice to feel mysterious but not evil. She has been calling the narrator toward her not to harm her, but to bring a missing part of her home.
Music
I wanted the music to recreate the echoing sound and feeling of journeying deeper and deeper into a crystalline cave, surrounded by dripping water. I layered handpan, bells, and piano to create the sound of droplets and reflections moving through the cave. Cello and violin add longing and nostalgia, while a bansuri flute feels like a distant voice drawing the narrator farther down the well.
The song intentionally has no repeating melody to represent the unpredictable journey into the unknown. It also stays in a minor key throughout the narrator's journey into the well. It only turns to bright and warm major key in the outro, when she finally recognizes and accepts her shadow, but the last chord returns to minor. I did not want the ending to suggest that accepting the shadow makes us completely “light” or happy. We learn to hold both sides of ourselves, and they continue to exist together.
Lyrics
For as long as I remember
I’ve had a recurring dream
Of a girl alone in the shadows
Where no light has ever been
As I see through her eyes from inside her mind
I wonder, who is she?
Is she a damsel in distress
Or a demon in disguise?
Lalalalala
(Come home to me)
A girl forgotten at the bottom of a well
Lalalalala
I’ve watched countless brave knights climb the height
Wizards with enchanted flight
Wise scholars with a wealth of insight
They tried, but none caught sight of the girl
All alone in the shadows
Where no light has been
Is she a siren’s song of death
Or a friend I haven’t met?
Lalalalala
(One breath)
(One breath at a time)
(Dive into the water)
(In the depths)
(In the depths, you will find)
(I am not your horror)
I feel a pull inside
(Come home to me)
Guide my way home to her
Reflect the surface of the water
(You are the key)
Her face is my mirror
She shows me what I hide
How I cannot shine and not cast a shadow
You are my other half of a whole
Lalalalala
Lalalalala
Lala lala
Lalalala lala
Lalalalalala
Credits
Music
Performer, Composer, & Producer: Tamlin.
Assistant Producer: Benjamin Thomas
Mix & Master Engineer: Be Hussey
Session Musicians:
Bansuri: Akshat Mehrotra
Cello: Liz Hanks
Guitar: Benjamin Thomas
Viola: Nacho Gobbi
Violin: Nacho Gobbi
